We have space!
Our new apartment has many selling points, but the number one reason we moved was for more space. We went from 90 sq.meters to 140. Suddenly the children seem a lot calmer and happier. True, they each have their own room now, although that doesn’t seem to be the big issue since Matan can usually be found wherever Karen happens to be. I think simply having more space adds to our sense of calm and well being. I think there was a study years ago that found that when you put too many rodents in a small space, they begin to act aggressively. It goes a long way to explaining Gaza, some say the most densely populated place in the world. Still, the Japanese seem to live, work and commute in very close quarters, yet it doesn’t seem to increase their outward aggression. Perhaps they’ve found a way to convert the aggression into a more useful energy force, like hard work.
We’re not Japanese, nor Gazan, nor are we rats, but our apartment experiment seems to indicate that the more space children, and probably adults have, the less aggressively they tend to behave.